What Do You Expect From Your Kids – Part 1

In our culture, we’ve lost the true definition of moving from childhood to adulthood by creating this ambiguous thing we call a ‘teenager’.  Did you know the word teenager wasn’t even in use until after WWII?  Go here to find out more about the history of the teenager.

In fact, when I look at what the culture of a teenager has become, I think the unintended consequences are proving to be debilitating to the next generation.  Teenagers have more to “do” than ever, they are more disconnected from God and family than ever, yet are more connected to friends they don’t really know, media opinions of the way they should act or dress, living or being tolerant of liberal lifestyles, and consumer target groups, than every generation before them combined.  Our kids are perishing.  They need our intentional leadership Parents!

To combat what has become the new normal, we have instilled a rite of passage.  My middle daughter Mackenzie is just about to turn 12.  In our home, we purpose to make 12 a very special birthday, and celebrate much like the Jewish families do when they bar-mitzvah.  At 12, we have set the bar very high, that she is to put more childish things behind her, and to embrace her new adulthood.

I know many of you think your kids would rebel against such expectations.  Let me help you out, in fact, I have the key to avoiding rebellion.  Kids do not rebel against authority, they rebel against Lack of Relationship. Think about it!  If you have a rebellious child on your hand, check the relational gas tank.

Does your family celebrate a rite of passage ritual?  What have you noticed about the teenage culture?

In Part 2, I will share the 15 qualities we will expect Mackenzie to be working toward by the time she is 15 years old.  In Part 3, I will unpack the Rebellious Child myth.  In Part 4, we’ll tackle Peer Pressure.  If you’d like to see something else added to this list, twitter @familyvision or www.Facebook.com/FamilyID.